All that I am

Love, let’s talk about love

Is it anything and everything you hoped for?

- Kendrick Lamar, All the stars

fell in love, when I was alone,

caught feelings, coz I liked butterflies,

sought attention, legend blames it on the youth,

finally, burned them all, once i grew up.

definitely, my loneliness was taken away from me,

the butterflies, gushed through my veins,

filled my stomach, heart and mind,

and blocked my vision, eventually.

and the cosmic size attention i received,

that was new.

call it anything you want,

it did seem like love to me.

why do opposite poles attract?

and yet, are kept away far from each other.

maybe, they stay apart, because together,

their catastrophe is more colossal than the attraction.

i never completely unraveled the whole of you.

but, an atom of what you were, was enough to topple my kismet.

i ran and ran and ran, to chase that miniscule of an atom,

and by the time i finally reached you,

the atom smoldered down,

only to rise as a phoenix of something narcissistic,

that i never saw coming.

people said, i chased the wrong person,

they bestowed their sympathy,

they also blamed you for my miseries,

but how do i tell them, that i brought this all on myself.

you were the reason, i realised later that,

all that you are, is all that i never want to be.

and all that i am now, is all that you never wanted me to be.